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Post Your Funnies, Any Funnies. I need to laugh!
- Thread starter AmyPJ
- Start date
And the culprit doesnt seem to have stopped
Dodging deer is for amatures. When a heard crosses in front of you it's a challenging game of deer slalom.
I was stuck behind someone in a slow moving vehicle going over the great lakes for too long one late night approaching the Manitoba boarder. The road had signs advising that slower vehicles could use the paved shoulder to allow passing. Apparently this driver got his license without being able to read. When I finaly got to the 4-laner in Manitoba (I think it went through a provincial park), I floored the chevette in top (5th) gear for a while to make up for lost time.....until I came across the deer slalom course, after which I slowed right down.
I was stuck behind someone in a slow moving vehicle going over the great lakes for too long one late night approaching the Manitoba boarder. The road had signs advising that slower vehicles could use the paved shoulder to allow passing. Apparently this driver got his license without being able to read. When I finaly got to the 4-laner in Manitoba (I think it went through a provincial park), I floored the chevette in top (5th) gear for a while to make up for lost time.....until I came across the deer slalom course, after which I slowed right down.
My plan includes keeping a sharp knife in my pocket in case I have a field dressing opportunity.
About 50 years ago I hit a deer with my car on a very early morning trip to my favorite fishing spot. I thought I was the only car on the road. Buy the time I stopped my car two guys in a pickup truck had pulled over and one had a big hunting knife in his hand, he looks at me and asked if I was going to take the deer. I replied that I was not going to and he started to dress it on the side of the road. These guys must have seen the deer hit and came out of the near by woods to harvest the road kill.
This is quickly becoming the no funnies thread.
A friend that grew up with his dad in a butcher shop gets to butcher road kill for the local food pantry from which he gets a share.
I had a deer stop in the middle of the road and look at me for a long time. Road was a bit icy, and I wasn’t in a huge hurry, so I sat there and waited for it to move, but it didn’t. So, I tapped the horn just to get it moving, and it promptly fell down. Pretty sure I cried I was laughing so hard. OK for the funnies thread?
On the note of funny and animals in the road, a friend if mine had a 3 year battle with his insurance company, the reason...... a flying cow totaled his VW Rabbit. Even though the police confirmed that he was not drunk or on drugs, the insurance company on the other hand not so understanding....a flying cow, cows don't fly.
The reason the cow was flying, it was hit by a transport going in the other direction launching the cow, so when my friend hit it, it definitely was flying.
The reason the cow was flying, it was hit by a transport going in the other direction launching the cow, so when my friend hit it, it definitely was flying.
Another example of someone that had just one job to do.
Subject: a Sensuous wife ......
After a delicious dinner and a few drinks Frema leads Yankel into the bedroom. With a very seductive voice the wife asked her husband, "Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?
"No," said her husband
She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 or 4 buttons of her blouse, and slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a soft, silky push-up bra, and pulled out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her and smiled approvingly.
She then asked him, "Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all crumpled up?"
"Uh... no, I haven't," he said, with an anxious tone in his voice.
She gave him another sexy little smile, pulled up her skirt, and seductively reached into her tight, sheer panties... and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill, and started breathing a little quicker with anticipation
"Now," she said, "have you ever seen $50,000 Dollars all crumpled up?"
"No way!" he said, while obviously becoming even more aroused and excited, to which she replied
"Go look in the garage....,
After a delicious dinner and a few drinks Frema leads Yankel into the bedroom. With a very seductive voice the wife asked her husband, "Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?
"No," said her husband
She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 or 4 buttons of her blouse, and slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a soft, silky push-up bra, and pulled out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her and smiled approvingly.
She then asked him, "Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all crumpled up?"
"Uh... no, I haven't," he said, with an anxious tone in his voice.
She gave him another sexy little smile, pulled up her skirt, and seductively reached into her tight, sheer panties... and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill, and started breathing a little quicker with anticipation
"Now," she said, "have you ever seen $50,000 Dollars all crumpled up?"
"No way!" he said, while obviously becoming even more aroused and excited, to which she replied
"Go look in the garage....,
My work boss was a fully qualified Naval Architect from a maritime college.
His first merchant marine job was to ride a banana boat. The task was to watch the temperature gage on the banana cooler ! Nothing else ! He quit after one voyage!
Explains some of the Navy's ships
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- Joined
- May 19, 2018
- Posts
- 760
- Joined
- May 19, 2018
- Posts
- 760